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Ben Carvosso MORNINGTON PENINSULA |
I Cried All The Way Home Submitted into: Miracles of Lessons in Life Category, On: 2008-06-29 On my final day of practice 5 months ago just before Christmas 2007, a patient I had seen earlier that day dropped back into the practice with a Christmas card for me. I didn't think much of it until the end of the day. I was packing up as I was no longer going to be practicing at the Centre in the new year. I noticed the card and thought Id have a read of it before I went. It was a simple card however inside was a 2 page letter. It read: Dear Ben I wanted to put this in writing to you because 1) I hope it's good feedback for you and 2) I still find some of this stuff difficult to say out loud. I resisted going to a chiropractor for a very long time. I actually scheduled and cancelled three appointments with you before I made it in to see you for the first time. I only came because the tremendous amount of pain I was in finally superseded my fear. When I was a teenager I was abducted, assaulted and almost choked to death. This is something I have had to deal with for the last twenty years. I have been to all kinds of healers, counsellors, mentors - you name it I have done it. I felt pretty confident that I had done all that I could, that I had dealt with it the best that I could, and that I was just going to be one of those people that would never truly be happy. So you can imagine the anxiety I felt coming to see you knowing that someone would have their hands around my neck again, and feeling physically vulnerable and powerless again. The first couple of visits to you, I had panic attacks there and back, and even drove straight to my GP for valium after one session. I very nearly cancelled every session, but somehow I summoned the courage to keep coming. And I am so glad I did because it has changed my life. Our dark moments are laden with potential, because they offer us the opportunity to reach new levels of awareness. And what I learnt, was that though I had tried to heal my emotional scars, I was disconnected from my physical body and my bones and muscles were still stuck in the past. Each time I came to see you, things got a little bit easier. My body was desensitizing to touch and I left feeling a little bit lighten then in the last 2 weeks I had a quantum leap. I reconnected with my body. I think all those years I secretly hated my body for betraying me, but now I have been able to release that anger and started trying to love myself. When I met you, I walked around with my head down and my body language closed. Now I walk taller, engage with people and feel open. I chose not to tell you this story until the end, because I didn't want you to make you self-conscious or modify your behaviour. So you unwittingly became the last piece of the puzzle to my healing process. I took the time to write this because I really want to honour you and what you do. You were kind, patient and created a safe space. You will never know the gift you have given me and hopefully one day I can pass that gift on to another. Thank you. I cried all the way home. It's amazing how lives are changed in the routine of daily practice, often without us ever knowing. I haven't seen the patient again but her letter of gratitude has also changed my life forever. You never know how much what you do or say will affect the lives of others. Dr Ben Carvosso Victoria Australia |
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